I have the strong urge to make myself sick or hurt myself badly at least 10 times a day each day some days I feel like beating the crap out of myself with my fathers belt, sometimes I want to go over to the river beside my house and jump in knowing I can’t swim. I had the urge to poke my eyes out with Pen earlier today and then cut my fingers off with my mothers kitchen knife. Sometimes when I’m alone in my room i feel like throwing myself up against the wall until i pass out or choke myself with a belt. I want to bite my lower lip until I go all the way through. I want to swallow all the detergent in the laundry room when i’m doing laundry. So I guess I can say I have the insane urge to hurt myself constantly.