124: Intrusive Thoughts

I have more intrusive thoughts than I can even count. When I’m around people, especially those that I love, the thought jumps into my head that I should injure or even kill them. I calculate lethal dosages for myself in my head, and ponder other ways of committing suicide. Should I drive into oncoming traffic? Set myself on fire? Drown myself? I have panic attacks when I think about the fact that nobody will remember me after I die, but always think about dying.
Zach [‘s family beware]

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